My friend is a 19 years old guy who at this moment is in college. In one of his classes he became friends with some people who later invited him to a cottage for the weekend about three weeks ago. In the cottage he met someone who unfortunately has a boyfriend; the first night there they had a party. After a couple drinks he found the courage to ask her to dance. The dance later turned into a small conversation. After talking, he realized that he liked her, but unfortunately they did not speak much after that night. After their trip to the cottage, my friend thought he would not talk to her anymore, but he was wrong. The next day the girl added him on Facebook. They began to talk every day until they decided to have a date. That day they talked a lot of what was happening between them and he found out that she has been in a really long relationship. Despite of it, she told him she was very interested in him and had never felt the same for someone else. After listening to my friend’s story he told me he was a bit scared because he does not know what to do because she mentioned that she was willing to give up everything to be with him and start something new. He told me all that, and asked me what I would do and if I could give him some advice. Before I gave him any advice I asked him some questions that I needed to know and I asked him to be very honest with me. We had a really long conversation, and he told me he was willing to give up many things too, but at the same time he feels selfish because his happiness might become the sadness of another man.

After listening to everything he had to say I said, “Look, if I were you I would hang out with her again and speak clearly with her one more time. Make sure to make things clear between you two and make her realize what is actually going on, because she is in a relationship of many years.” Then I gave him another option and said, “you might also give her some time alone so she can consider everything like her thoughts and feelings, and like that she will make the right decision, or “you could simply keep going with her plan of breaking up with her boyfriend and see where things go, remember you are still young and you should enjoy life”

I also thought that I did not consider my friend’s feelings; I was just telling him what he must do with her and not about her. I was being so rational and I found out that people can also think with their hearts. Therefore I could give him another kind of advice like, “I would live the moment and let all the feelings come out”, I said, “If I were you I would think if she come out in that way, I must not let her go”.

Finally he was really grateful and he heard every advice I tried to give him. My friend told me he just needed a good friend who was able to listen the situation he is living. I hope he make the right decision, though. Well, he is my friend I just want him to be happy.

Sebastián Tamayo.

MY HUSBAND AND I HAVE HORRIBLE COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS

Yesterday a friend of mine, Sara, sent me an e-mail in which she related her problem: “My husband and I stopped talking to each other. We still give over the essential information to make our family run efficiently, but we never share our feelings, ideas and dreams. I figure out that this is better than the fighting we used to do, at least there is peace in our home, but the price to pay for this serenity is a sense of emptiness and sadness. I just don’t know how to stop this apathy…. Can you give me some advice??? ”.

I take this email that my friend sent me to talk you about a very common problem in relationships today: Lack of communication; most couples never really learn how to speak to each other effectively! I want to use this space in the magazine to respond to Sara and many readers who have the same problem, giving some advices: what to do and what not to do when a relationship suffers a lack of communication.

At the start of the relationship, conversations are exciting and fun, and can take you a lot of hours at phone, both of you spend a lot of time getting to know each other, but as time goes by, people assume that they know everything about each other. My first advice: You shouldn’t assume you know everything about each other; we’re all changing all the time, in our preferences and the way we look at life. If you don’t do that you run the risk of romance starting to not work well, or one of you will start to confide in some other person who seems more comprehensive.

On the other hand I think is rally unhealthy to just stop talking to each other, and only sharing the basic information about children and bills. It is an easy and comfortable solution but what will happen to the relationship in the long term?, I think it won’t work and will become a burden. My second advice: you should use part of the day, every day, to talk with your partner, without any interruption. Speak not only about children and bills, also of how was your day and his/hers day at work, with officemates, etc. The first day tell your partner, if it is true, that you are concerned about the relationship and you really want to take some actions to start improving how you communicate.  Let him/her know you take ownership for your actions and then ask him/her what you could do to improve your relationship and tell him/her your opinion on what he/she would do to improve the relationship.

My third advice: Speak up and listen; this will increase the honesty in marriage. By speaking up I’m not saying that you remove the filter between your brain and mouth, but speak up more. How often do you avoid replying of fear of your partner’s reaction? There are times when you need to speak up in order to help your marriage grow. But you should speak in a respectful way, avoiding screaming and banning phrases such as "You always ..." or "You never ....", these sentences tend to attract defensive behavior. By listen I mean you should use body language to show you are listening. Don’t doodle, look at your watch, or pick at your nails, you can't communicate while you're checking your cellphone, watching TV, or flipping through the sports section! Nod so the other person knows you're getting the message, and rephrase if you need to.

Finally, I invite all readers to develop effective communication processes with their partners: Communication is a key word to keep a relationship alive. The ability to tell each other thoughts, feelings and wants is so important. Good, open, and honest communication is like oil to a car. Without oil in the car, the car won’t work. Communication is important!

By: Yuly Andrea Arboleda Valencia

Hugo Berrío's text

I have an important friend, his name is Nicolas Mejia, last week he called me and told me that he is really worried because his girlfriend is pregnant and they are both teenagers. Daniela who is Nicolas ‘girlfriend wants to abort because she says, they are not prepared for parenthood and they are just college students. Nicolas tried to convince her not to abort but she really wants to do it, he told me that he thinks she is in shock and she is not thinking like she did.

So, I told him he needed to talk with his parents, because this problem is very serious and if she aborts, she would go to jail for killing a human being, and that way, Nicolas’ parents may convince her not to do it, and if it doesn’t work, I told him to go tell her dad, because he’s really strict and he may change her idea to abort.

If I were him, I would principally talk to her like a mature person in a private place. Then go to a psychologist, because he can give you professional suggestions and he could calm down your girlfriend, and for sure the psychologist will give you invaluable physiological and psychological ideas to not abort, because abortion has very dangerous consequences for your body, and if all those suggestions don’t work, demand her.

And remember, my dear friend, the first way to solve problems is talking.

By: Hugo Daniel Berrío Jaramillo.

Dear CC

Dear CC

My friends are planning a trip for the summer, they are planning to go to Orlando in USA and go to all theme parks. I want to go with them but I have 3 problems.

The first one is that I think I can’t borrow enough money for the trip, I only can borrow 1000usd but we need 1500usd and I don’t know how I can get the rest of the money. By other side I have a lot of afraid to the heights so I’m absolutely sure that I’m not going to enjoy the attractions of the theme parks so I think I will to waste my money, and the last problem is with my mother she is going to has her vacations at the same time that my friends are planning the trip, and she wants we both travel to New York, she wants to make this trip a lot of time ago.

Hi CG, if I had the opportunity to travel with my family and friends I would find the way to make both trips. If I were you I’d organized the dates with my friends and with my mom. You could spend some day with your friends and other days with your mom, I think Orlando and New York are a little bit closer and the tickets are not too expensive, though.

If you didn't have all the money you’d find any promotion and get some savings for the trip. You could find fly tickets, theme park tickets or hotels in promotion, if you could find any promotion you’d travel easily and cheaper.

If you really are afraid of heights, you don’t have to ride in all the attractions; you could find those attractions that would be great and fun for you. But if you didn't find any funny attraction you might want to buy an standard ticket that doesn't includes all the attractions and it turned out be cheaper too.

I wish I gave you any good ideas to plan your trip. If you organized your time and money you’d enjoy a wonderful vacation with your family and friends doing the things you like most.

Cristina Chica Gomez

My friend

Jon is a friend who lives in USA and we met a long time ago. Last week Iwas talking with him on facebook and he told me he had a girlfriend and they were together for five years her name is Beth .

Last weekend he had to work and his girlfriend went out with with her friends and they went to a disco. There was a man in the disco she used to like. They were drinking vodka and when beth was drunk he kissed her. She was sorry and she told Jon the truth. They broke up and he started consume drugs, he was very depressed.

I told him that drugs just “help” you for a while but they are very dangerous for the organism. I told him that if I were him I’d try to talk with her and make the right decision for both keeping in mind the memories, the moments they spent together  and all these things. If I were him I’d tell her that I’m in drugs and I need her to help me with this big problem.

I suggested him try to join in a rehabilitation center if  necessary, for following  the process and try to quit the drugs.

All these things will help him if he does them consciously and he has to keep in mind that all the relationships have troubles, but if is true love it does not care.

Juan Jose Tobon 

Someday Julian, David’s closest friend wrote a letter to him, because he was living in another country and had a big problem. The letter said:

Dear David, I am writing you because I have a problem with my family, I want to study music, but my mother said “Julian you have to study a career that gives you more money, you know it’s a ill paid career” I don’t know what should i do, I love music and bass but I can’t pay my career, my mom said it too, “if you want to study music you would have to pay this career by your way”

And I have another problem too, my father is a workaholic and he only loves the money and for that reason he wants me to study business administration. Please David can you give me a recommendation, I would appreciate it. Thank you.  Julian

Julian, if I were you, I would follow my dreams and study music, everything in life is not about the money. I think the best way to solve your problem is talking with your parents, and tell them you want to study music and follow your dreams, and nothing will stop you. For the other way, you should search a job and start to work, and then you can pay your own career, I know it’s hard, but is the way to follow your dreams.

2 months later, David receives a new letter from Julian, the letter said:

David, I followed your recommendations, and in this moment I’m studying music, I’m very happy, because I following my dreams, and after I talked with my family, they told me that my decision was good and in this moment they support me a lot. Thank you men. 

By: David Andrés Escobar

DEAR BIANCA

MY SUGGESTIONS BY JUAN SEBASTIAN  CARDONA

CCA LEVEL 11

dear bianca

Some time ago, I wondered how to tell if your boyfriend is cheating

and sent me a list of what your boyfriend secretly,

of evidence I will give some tips to improve your life

1. Your boyfriend does not have time to call: it is very common that your boyfriend is busy working or studying, but be reminded that there is always time for a call, it costs nothing, and gives you the confidence to move ahead.

2. your boyfriend spends very little time with you: there may be some differences for those who want to spend less time with the other person, but you have to appreciate the differences if you want to be with him.

3. your boyfriend is no longer attracted to you: about trying new things that appeal to you, you can try to think like him to revive your sex life.

4. her boyfriend does not like to do something together: try everyday things like laundry, hanging towels, turn on the tv, clean room, simple things closer together as a couple

5. your friends see your boyfriend with other people: it is normal for your boyfriend Meet new people, but it's good to introduce you to your new social circle, si esto no pasa no hay la suficiente confianza

6. saw him kissing another woman: now  you have the evidence that you needed to leave him, show him that you deserve any better and get someone that if you want to love ...........

Women realize ............................

I do it because I love you and I want you to realize that him  does not deserve you, there are many more men who can give you what you want, stability, love and happiness ............. ... you can overcome this, I recommend that you go out with your friends, conoscas new people and fall in love again.

if you feel better Copy Me

with best wishes your friend juan sebastian

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU WERE THE PERSON IN THIS SITUATION.?

LAURA VANEGAS

I have many friend who calls me to talk about little problems,
sandra is a college friend, she called me the last month with a particular problem.
she was telling me that at home the situation is very complicated, because she is pregnant and nobody knows about it, and her family started to asks her why she is a little bit fat lately.

she doesn't has a boyfriend or something like that, neither nobody to support her, and she is a minor and this is her firts year in college, she can't even work and she's scared because her family doesn't has resources to raise a child, and actually raise a child is very expensive, and being a teenager is not only expensive also very hard.

when she told me all this, I stopped breathing for a minutes, I couldn't even think in solution for a while, because a was in shock... but when I calmed down I told her: Please don't  think of interrupting your pregnancy!! the baby is a human been, he doesn't have any fault.. if I were you, I would call to something like a ONG asking for help, and if you want look for the father of the baby and tell him the true, do it! because this is very serius.. and if he doesn't want to take over, you should speak with the Commissioner family, it's free!!  and please speech with your family too, they have to understand..  at the begining they will be very angry but it


she has four month of pregnancy now,  and even doesn't know what to do with her baby...  I wish I had the way to help her but I'm a teenager too, and I still live with my parents..

but.. what would you do if you had the way to help a good friend?


HAVE A NICE DAY!

My suggestions to a good friend, By Hugo Vélez R

My suggestions to a good friend,

By Hugo Vélez R

CCA level 11

My friend Barack ,who is a good person and represents the black powerd right now, has a big problem. He doesn't know how to deal his new problem with Kim Jong. Kim is a cute and small Korean dictator who threatened to attack USA, and Barack asked me a favor to give him some suggestions.  I sent the following ideas about this problem.

• ·         I wonder if Kim is having great sex, Kim is likely to need some of sex for get a little relaxes in her life. If the problem is sex I think my dear friend Barack should be a good invitation to Cartagena, is a lot of probably that Kim find a good Samaritan that cover hisr necessity, of course the White House pays the  bill. On the other hand Is possible that Kim is anxious,in this case I think Barack should do sent him a ton of marijuana, in California he can find a lot of that , an it is probably that if Kim tasted California marijuana and  doesn’t like but however is possible that he enjoy very much and decides change a war way to peace way. Is important to consider that the poor Kim grew up in a military environment, this situation obviously is a very bad precedent because I wonder what kind of things learn a man who grew up into a military structure?... war, guns, uniforms, old and borings man around him, not coca colas, not hot dogs, any rock music.. Can you imagine this life for you? Barack is someone I can trust, he is my friend and I know is a good person, I know that if he could send a special team to negotiate with funny small Korean, maybe my near friend can sentd to Monica, can you remember who is?.. Mr. Clinton knows about that. Or maybe Barack  can sent to Madonna, is possible that she may convince the small dictator to change the idea and come to America to dance with her in American Airlines in Miami.

• ·         As Kim spent his childhood in a military barracks is possible that he is a little different, you know… maybe a little gay, trans or anything else, in this case I recommend to my friend Barack he can talk with Anderson Coopers or Ricky, or maybe Jorge Bush, the last of the list is a good alternative because he is strange case that you don’t know what is it, a human, a pig, a ex president, a farmer, a cow like human..Anyway I think Mr. Bush is not an animal the animals are better than he. Kim is really an unfriendly neighbor in the global context but that’s the life, not always you have only goods things. I think Barack can try with unthinkable things, maybe if he send a vibrator or a inflatable doll like Scarlett Johansson, then Barack can send Kim an email with some promises if Kim would like of course, those promises can be for example that Barack will invite Kim to Disney, can you imagine Kim in a roller coaster with Mickey Mouse next to him? Other promise can be for example invite  him to go to a basketball playoff, it starts this month and is possible that when Kim know some players and compare their height with his, obviously he will need to consider his decision.

But because the life isn’t easy like I would like it to be, I think my good friend Barack can put his finger in a red button and in a few minutes Mr. Kim wont be a problem any more.

Bye and have a nice adventure every day.

Best regards, 

Hugo Vélez R, a humble Barack's friend